WHEN YOUR FRIEND IS MUCH RICHER THAN YOURSELF

You friend is reacher than yourself. He leads a lap of luxury. You feel you are different from him. You can’t help feeling inferior to him. And it is sure you envy him. How come?what to do to cope with this. Difficult condition. Here are some steps to take:

1. Don’t compare yourself to your rich friend

It is the most significant thing to do. Compare youself to those less fortunate than yourself. That’s the wiser thing to do. If you compare yourself to the rich ones, you will come up restless and sadder. Because you are not as rich as they are. Because you lead a not so charmed life, meanwhile they look happier than anyone else: going places in their luxurious cars, wearing a wristwactch from Italy, going abroad in holidays, enjoying the newest blockbuster movies on LD, eating out only in the greatest restaurants and so forth. Thinking of these, you abruptly feel miserable and lose happiness: time wasting.
Nothing is more important than this. Accept your life as it is. Instead of grumbling and mourning, start thinking positive. Figure out things that has made and always make you happy in life. One and all, money is not the only thing to make us happy. And being in the poverty at present doesn’t mean you have to suffer from it the rest of your life. But if you only moan, you will.

2. Examine what you value

If your rich friend puts on a flashy fashionable shirt wort Rp.300.000, it doesn’t mean that you have to keep up with him. If you do this, yo don’t know what to afford. The result: you will get broke only by buying one shirt. Chances are you may be financially sunk because of one shirt. That’s why, it is important not to compare yourshelf to a richer one. You have your own financial level. And there is nothing wrong, if you are unable to catch up with him.
The best way to avoid getting into competition with a rich friend is to tell the truth about you financial condition. Say what you can and can’t afford to. For instance, say that you have no ATM card, no credit cards, savings in bank and so on if it is really true. There is nothing embarrassing not to have a saving account in a bank, especially if you really have no money to save. If you are close enough with a rich one, you may tell him your financial problem. But, it doesn’t mean that you hope this financial help. Don’t make a splash by keeping telling it over and over again. But being open about your condition will be of much help. Tell him only to give information. Tell him in the right time: if he invites you to eat out in some restaurant. Make sure whether he wil treat you or not. But don’t bore him by keeping telling him your financial problems.
Open discussions are very important. If there’s a sudden financial imbalance in an otherwise equal relationship, don’t pretend it hasn’t happened. Beliefs about money and everything it stands for—power, self-esteem, freedom—are a number-one cause of fights between people. If the feelings aren’t revealed and talked about openly, the relationship will suffer.

3. Be independent

You friend is rich. Okay, but that doesn’t mean that you can be financialy dependent on him. A real friendship doesn’t have to do with money. If you rich friend tend to underestimate you for your being less fortunate financially, it is time to think your friendship over. If he is very generous that you turn into dependent on him. Think it over your crucial position. Don’t accept his help, although he considers it as a loan. Otherwise things may turn out of hand.
Don’t mix up friendship with money problems. Don’t risk your frienship by involving him in your money problems. Real friendship can only be done between independent people. It is two ways relationship. And being independent is important. First, because you can’t be dependent on others the rest of your life. Second, there is always time you have to stand on your own feet. Third, being independent now will be meaningful for you next time. That’s how you should be. The present pain of being independent may be a price for your future life.

4. Feel yourself

Just because your friend is is richer doesn’t mean that your relationship with him is in real danger. You may think that have nothing to share. All people, even the rich ones, have their own needs. As a friend, a rich one normally may not need your financial help. But it is true that he may still need you as a mere human being. And talking about human being, there are many psychological things involved. He may need to cope with this stress. He may need someone to be happy for his success. He may need someone to share his success. Talking about frienship is about two souls—not two money makers—tied in suitably fondness to each other. Anyway, having a rich friend, is a wonderful resource. He can teach you things you need to know about being rich.